You can’t win against life. Life is dealing all the cards. We just gotta make the most of what hand we get. Keep calm and make friends with our reality.
I’m not exactly winning at life. I’m not losing either. I’m somewhere in the middle, just quietly surviving, existing. But you know, the more I talk to people, I find that we’re all pretty much in the same boat, paddling around a giant lake in the wilderness, trying to find the shore, trying to make sense of this insane world.
I had a stern talk with God today. I was like, dude, what’s up with all this BS. Why’s it gotta be like this? If you’re so omnipotent, why can’t you just make everything AWESOME? He’s not talking to me at the moment. Or maybe I’m not listening. Hence no answer.
So yeah I’ve been riding the roller-coaster, doing my rounds, having some really beautiful highs and some low points I’d rather not write about. I’ve come to accept that Struggle is a friend of mine who visits often.
That said, my friends Happiness, Love, Joy and Beauty visit me just as regularly. On the whole, I’m pretty damn lucky. I am actually truly grateful for my incredible life. My family, my friends, my beautiful home, my environment, my gift of music, my education, so many things.
There’s my belated answer from God. Everything IS awesome you dingbat. You’re just drowning in the deep-end, forgetting that you know how to swim. Looking for the sunlight with your eyes closed. Watering down your cup of love with domestic blindness.
Tuesday I was home alone and Sorrow came over. I wanted some company so I opened the door to her and she sat down with me on the couch. We had a chat about life and she was her usual sad, pessimistic self, giving me a hard time, the usual crap. You’re not good enough, you’ll never get anywhere, call yourself an artist, etc etc.
So you know what I did? Well, first I cried. Then I picked up my guitar and wrote a song about it.
And it’s a fucking beautiful song.
And I sang it to Sorrow and watched her disappear as I alchemised her into beautiful music.
Then I sang my beautiful song to other friends and strangers and transported them to her heavenly realms.
My heART-ache became just ART, without the he-ache.
Sorrow became beauty, love, inspiration, joy and shared experience.
This is the healing power of art. This is your gift. Use your pain, anger, sadness, frustration, disappointment, as fuel for your art. When difficult emotions crop up, welcome them, listen to them, and harness their powerful energy into a beautiful creation.
All the great creators do it. You can too.
I’m doing it now.
I love you.